What Not To Write

Alex Epstein flagged this on his blog a day or so ago and it’s worth passing on to anyone who doesn’t pay him a visit. It also saves me from dissecting a rather gloomy and unproductive day.

The editors of the online magazine Strange Horizons, while always on the lookout for contributors, have posted lists of stories the poor souls have obviously seen far too often and don’t want to see ever again. The lists are divided into horror plots and general plots, although given the content of the magazine they are biased toward science fiction.

Even though they’re talking about the prose submissions, a lot of what they say could easily apply to film and television. Especially now that what has been on offer of late has driven us to become bored and jaded and on the point of pouring bleach in our eyes. (Or maybe that’s just me).

Given how much science fiction shows complete and utter contempt to the science part, I did like:

An A.I. gets loose on the Net despite the computer it was on not being connected to the Net.

An A.I. gets loose on the Net but the author doesn't have a clear concept of what it means for software to be "loose on the Net." (Hint: the Net is currently a collection of individual computers, not some kind of big ubercomputer; software doesn't currently run in the wires between computers*.)

They keep updating the list. So far, what have they missed?

* Right here, I would have written “you fucking muppets!” Obviously they’re more tolerant that I am.