Blackstuffed

Gauging the reactions of the pals to the Edge of Darkness trailer and the expert way that a Hollywood studio will take a wholly original piece of drama and reduce it down to a horribly generic thriller, one response was that next up should be a remake of Boys from the Blackstuff. With Steven Seagal cast as Yosser Hughes, they could promote it with:

They took away his job.
They took away his home.
They took away his children.
But one thing they couldn't take away...
was his MIND!

The next day he came back with the addendum that Boys from the Blackstuff really should be a “bunch of guys on a mission” movie. I put forward the idea of a select group of road workers, having lost their homes and families in the Blitz, volunteer for a secret mission that will see them parachuted into Nazi Germany with forged orders to repave the road leading up to the Wolf’s Lair. Craftily planting mines under the tarmac, all they have to do for the plan to succeed is convince Hitler to drive the steamroller.

That sounded idiotic enough to make it a winner for the dead-eyed, popcorn munching numpties. Putting the whole of the BBC back catalogue up for grabs, what else can we making a killing with?